My Pain is Self Chosen

The whole tattooing experience was surreal. I knew there was going to be pain. As a matter of fact, I talked to a lot of people about the pain.

Some said that you get so psyched about the pain that when you first get "poked," you'll just be saying to yourself "Nah, it ain't that bad.."

Some said that it felt like tiny cutter blades scraping and actually peeling your skin, and then imagine that happening over and over again for more than an hour. Ouch.

The tattoo artist started with the outline of the characters and he used a needle with I think just one or two needle points. He started at the bottom character then worked his way up. It wasn't really that painful at first, however, I wasn't prepared for the shock that my body had to endure. When he was already outlining the second character from the bottom, I felt really lightheaded, my fingers and toes were going numb, my vision was blurring, and although I could still hear what they were saying, I felt my sense of hearing drop off a little. I was this close to passing out. I think that in about 5 seconds or more, I would have. Thankfully, I was able to call time out and asked for a break. They said that I looked extremely pale at that time - my skin was already porcelain white and my lips had absolutely no color. I can laugh about it right now, but that time was almost traumatic. (Actually, Mae Dei was laughing at me the entire time.) Anyway, I before I could totally pass out, I was able to lie down and rest for about 5 to 10 minutes. After I my head cleared up, I went at it again. He finished the outline for all four characters and then proceeded with shading inside the outlines. It is common belief that the tattooing of the outline is actually more painful than the shading. In my case, it was the exact opposite, the shading part was more painful. Way more painful. This time, he was using a needle with like 5 or 6 sharp needle points for the shading. The tattoo artist actually said: "More muscle less pain. More fat more pain." That was so true for me. I felt like the pain was everywhere. I guess one of the things I could be proud of was the reality that I did not pass out. I endured.

I was actually able to finish the entire session with just two more breaks - I had to pick up Seiichi from school and I had to eat something. He asked me at the beginning if I ate a full meal. And I did, just hours before. What I didn't realize was that all my strength will be sapped from my entire being because of the enduring pain. I actually felt hungry just after a few minutes of starting. So I ate bread and pasta in between.

After everything was done, I looked at my tattoo in the mirror and I was so hyped up. I couldn't believe that FINALLY I got a tattoo. I couldn't help myself from doing rockstar hand signs to myself in the mirror. It turned out to be awesome. I like my design. I like the fact that Seiichi's name will be forever part of my body. I like everything about it.

I paid the artist his fee which was 2,500 Pesos and I said to him "Pinakamasayang bayad ko 'to ng 2-5 sa buong buhay ko. Sobrang astig 'eh." We were both happy with how the tattoo turned out and I thanked him for the quality service.

In the end, I was so glad that I paid 2,500 pesos for the tattoo and 800 pesos for our car's tint - and not the other way around.